The Supper Club
January 5, 2009
One recent evening, I was talking with my friend Kate about healthy eating strategies and favorite recipes. When we realized we were both cooking the same meals, we thought: why duplicate our efforts? Let's have a supper club!
New Kids in Town
December 29, 2008
My son, daughter-in-law, and brilliant, gorgeous toddler grandchild have moved to a new city. They're meeting people through work, neighborhood, day care, religious ties. But how to transform acquaintances into friends?
Common Tables
December 22, 2008
What would you do if you wanted to, say, help everyone in the world to get along? If you were Dave Corey, you would invite them to dinner.
How Small Meals Bring Big Holidays Down to Size
December 15, 2008
Sometimes I think December should be renamed Marathon Month. You've got the dash to each event, the eye on the stopwatch, the extreme ups and downs. I find myself thinking about the endurance and pacing necessary to get through the whole course.
May Your Holidays Be Light
December 8, 2008
On Thanksgiving this year I gave up the turkey. I ALWAYS make turkey just the way my mother did. I LOVE having turkey this way. You can guess what it meant to hand over the turkey, the stuffing AND the gravy.
Healing Meals
December 1, 2008
My friend Ellie has a son in his 20s who has spent the past couple of years hospitalized for schizophrenia. When he moved from a secure unit to a "house" on the hospital grounds, Ellie and George began to make dinners for his housemates. (There are ten or twelve altogether.) The two of them would go shopping, and then get to work.
Thanksgiving
November 24, 2008
We will be having Thanksgiving at our house this year. I'm counting the dishes, planning out menus, trying to decide where everyone will sleep.
Cook with Your Kids
November 17, 2008
Wouldn't you know it: now there is even a study that shows that kids who cook are more likely to try a variety of foods. Researchers at Columbia University studied 600 kids from kindergarten to sixth grade. Those who took part in cooking workshops were more likely to eat the foods they had prepared. As one researcher said, "Kids don't usually like radishes, but we found that if kids cut up radishes and put them in the salad, they love the radishes."
Technology Works!
November 10, 2008
I have one friend who swears that she owes her family meals to her slow cooker. Before she leaves for work in the morning, she throws in some cut-up meat and vegetables, sprinkles the mix with a few spices, then leaves for the day. Sometimes she goes vegetarian, with or without beans.
Election Day
November 3, 2008
Every election is important, but this year's contest has dragged many of us from the sidelines. (Did you know that, on average, only 54 percent of eligible U.S. voters find their way to their polling stations? Out of 172 nations, we rank a sorry 139th.)
Fortifying "Spirits" at Halloween...
October 27, 2008
Halloween is the time we let the scary things out. We allow pint-sized ghosts to wander our neighborhoods, demanding bribes of candy. We let the frightened, and frightening, parts of ourselves come out a little bit too.
Innovative Routine
October 20, 2008
Regular family meals help us because they are predictable and reliable. We count on their being part of our daily routine.
Fishing
October 13, 2008
My friend Betsy has been going fishing with her husband as long as they have been married. For most of the time, it was Julian who would fish, and Betsy who would admire the scenery.
Breaking in the New Kitchen
October 6, 2008
My husband and I finally moved into our new house! The first few days, it seemed like we lived in a box factory, but little by little, things got unpacked. I really wanted to invite our friends, Joe and Maggie, over for a meal. They had been so welcoming to us during the renovations. I told them not to expect much, but I felt they should have the place of honor as our first guests.
In Sun and Shadow
September 29, 2008
My friends Kate and Andy love to invite people for meals, but they like to do it at the last minute. Less pressure for everyone. Still, it's always surprising what a nice meal, and how many guests, they manage to come up with on short notice.
Saved by the Book
September 22, 2008
My friend Jeanne had her granddaughters for two weeks while their parents went on vacation. She adores the girls, and their parents, but she found that the kids' table manners got on her nerves. They squirmed, purposely fell off their chairs, played with their food. Worse, Jeanne knew many kids the same ages who behaved a lot better.
Family Day Stopped Me in my Tracks
September 15, 2008
Several years ago, browsing through a library that specializes in food, I came upon the information from CASA, The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse at Columbia University, describing the importance of family meals in keeping kids away from destructive behaviors. It made intuitive sense, but it was news to me.
Young Adults: What Feels Like Home
September 8, 2008
I've known Julia since she was five. Now she's a twenty-something living in New York City. Every Sunday evening, you will find her at "family dinner," even though her family lives two hundred miles away.
What we can learn from Mexican dogs
September 1, 2008
Did you know…When researchers presented foods to children in a positive, friendly way, the kids came to prefer those foods.
Back to School, Back to the Table
August 25, 2008
Did you know...Kids who eat family suppers regularly get better grades in school.
Up From the Basement
August 18, 2008
Because we are doing major work on our house, my husband and I have moved into our friends' basement for the summer. Their two-room apartment is not legal, so, although there is an area that looks like a kitchen, it is missing a stove.
One Very Nourishing Idea
August 11, 2008
If there were a Nobel Prize for common sense, I would nominate nutritionist Ellyn Satter. After years of helping families sort out eating problems, she came up with a simple way of looking at food issues so they don't become Issues.
Talking Togetherness
August 4, 2008
Okay, so now you're all sitting down together. What do you say, and how does that help define the meal?
Eat Healthy – at home and away
July 28, 2008
Did You Know...Children who eat dinner with their family eat more vegetables and calcium, less junk food.
Fiesta!
July 21, 2008
On a recent summer night, my friends and I made our annual visit to St. Peter's Fiesta. We checked out the games of chance, listened to a couple of stunningly amateurish bands, and did some tremendous people-watching. I also ate my yearly sausage and pepper sandwich, washed down by hand-squeezed lemonade.
Grandma Knows Best?
July 14, 2008
When my friend Marcea has her grandkids at her house, she does what comes naturally to her. She serves supper at more or less the same time every night. She sets out the same food for everyone. She expects the kids (pre-school through elementary school-age) to sit for awhile and talk to whoever is at the table. "This is how it is here," she says, matter-of-factly.
Ritual Time
July 7, 2008
When my kids were squirming toddlers, if you had told me that our nightly episodes of food-mashing were about meaning and ritual, I would have had a hard time keeping a straight face. But a generation and a lot of research later, I'm beginning to understand how that's true.
It's Fourth of July; Let's Eat
June 30, 2008
In small town New England, where I live, July Fourth is the busiest day of the year. At the parade and at the fireworks, you see people you haven't seen in ages.
The Whole World Over
June 23, 2008
Did you ever wonder how your family's food consumption compares with, say, a family in Ecuador or Bhutan? A new book compares what families around the world eat over the course of a week.
Blending food, and families
June 16, 2008
Decades later, my friend Jessica's mouth waters when she remembers her stepmother's cooking. "My mother and my great aunt, who lived with us, were immigrants. They cooked peasant food, and never used a cookbook." But her stepmother read gourmet magazines and introduced Jessica to the extravagant salmon en croute.
A Day for Fathers, and the Rest of the Family As Well
June 9, 2008
Did you know...One in five adults took a trip to attend a family reunion in the last year.
Setting the Tone
June 2, 2008
How would you like your mealtimes to feel – calm, lively, stimulating, relaxed? Just as you set the table, you can set the tone. If you want your boisterous kids to bring it down a notch, begin with a moment of quiet. If your goal is to help your shy one join in, make sure to give her uninterrupted time.
Please Please Please
May 27, 2008
Do you spend half your mealtimes trying to "civilize" your wild kids? Don't worry; this has been going on for centuries.
The Age for Learning Kitchen Skills?
May 19, 2008
I am trying to remember how old I was when my mother first phoned us from work, said she was running late, and asked my sister and me to get our father's dinner on the table so he could make his evening office hours. I am guessing that I was about ten, my sister twelve.
Snacks and Meals
May 12, 2008
Did you know? In families that watch tv during meals, kids eat fewer fruits and vegetables. They consume more pizzas, snack foods, and sodas than kids in families who turn off the tv's.
Mothers and Meals
May 5, 2008
I remember being a new mom and ravenously hungry, but unable to eat at the moment because my baby was even hungrier than I. So I sat down and nursed him...and my mother, half as a joke, cobbled together a lunch, took up a spoon, and began to feed me.
What Can a Two-Year-Old Do?
April 28, 2008
Did you know? In the past twenty years, the number of married Americans who report that their family "usually eats dinner together" declined by one third.
Picture Perfect Moments
April 21, 2008
Wandering around the Internet, I have been surprised and touched by what people choose to post on the subject of family meals.
This is What Perfect Looks Like
April 14, 2008
One member of my family can never seem to make it to the table without be called half a dozen times. (We are not naming names here, but he knows who he is.) Another always regards the food on her plate with suspicion, poking a fork into whatever is served, as if looking for worms.
Starving for Time
April 7, 2008
Did You Know? Twenty-one percent of teens rated "not having enough time together with parents" as their top concern.
What Are You Saving the Good Dishes For?
March 31, 2008
Sometimes, on those days when my friend Betsy only has enough energy for take-out Chinese, she gives herself, and her family, a lift, by serving the meal on her mother's "good" dishes — fine china with hand-painted orange chrysanthemums. She tells her kids to be super careful, and they are so impressed that they generally are.
The Family Team
March 24, 2008
Did you know? Over a recent 16-year-period, the amount of time that children spent watching other people (like their siblings) play sports rose five-fold.
Thank the Cook
March 17, 2008
Did you know? Children and teens who eat family dinners eat more fruits and vegetables, and less fried food.
Eat Facing Each Other
March 10, 2008
I have been collecting images of families eating together across many cultures and down through centuries of time. Whether they squat on jungle floors, sit cross-legged on carpets, recline on mats, or sit around open fires, they have one thing in common: they all eat facing each other.
What To Talk About At Mealtimes
March 3, 2008
Did You Know.....Kids bring up an average of six different topics per meal.
Parents and Grandparents Remember
February 25, 2008
Did you know? Foreign-born children are more likely to eat family meals than are native-born children with foreign-born parents. And both those groups eat more meals together than do families in which everyone is native-born.
What Kids Learn at the Table
February 18, 2008
Did You Know...Preschoolers increase their vocabulary by being part of dinner table conversation. This larger vocabulary helps them in school – in kindergarten and beyond.
Order out of Chaos
February 11, 2008
I recently found a photo taken in the aftermath of the 1906 earthquake that leveled the city of San Francisco. The hundred-year-old black and white image shows a burned-out and shattered cityscape.
Food from the Heart
February 4, 2008
When Mr. Rogers used to sing, "There are many ways to say I love you. There's the cooking way to say I care about you," preschoolers and grown ups alike knew just what he meant. So why not make a special family dinner for Valentines Day?
The One Right Way – Not!
January 28, 2008
I'm guessing that, early on in the parenting experience, you had the same realization that I did: No one has all the answers. A large part of it is made up as we go.
The Magic Chair
January 21, 2008
When my first child was little, we splurged on the purchase of an all-purpose chair. It was made out of wood, and came with its own Allen wrench. The maker promised that we could reconfigure it over and over again. It could hold anyone from a six-month-old to a small adult. We were skeptical, but we needed somewhere to put the baby.
Family For A Day
January 14, 2008
Okay, so I am that old. I remember when our family first got a tv. My mother, being up-to-date, set places for the kids at the coffee table, where we sat on the floor and ate while, in the days of only three stations, we watched Queen for a Day. My father, who could hear the show from the dining room, kept up a running critique of what he called the sob stories. (Women, often in tears, would tell the sad tales of their lives. The audience applauded; the winner went home with a washer or a refrigerator.)
TV or not TV?
January 7, 2008
Did you know? A study at Baylor Medical College found that kids who are overweight were more than twice as likely as normal-weight kids to eat supper in front of the TV.
Mark Your Calendars!
January 2, 2008
Did you know...seventy-eight percent of families say that they have a family dinner at least a few times a week.
A Steady Point in a Swirling World
December 26, 2007
Did You Know...For children who have asthma, if families maintain regular rituals like eating dinner together, kids miss fewer days of school, have fewer emergency room visits and hospitalizations.
Tastes of Tradition
December 17, 2007
At this time of year, when we think about how things have "always" been, one of the most direct ways to access that elusive "always" is by making and serving traditional foods.
Ritual Time
December 10, 2007
Did You Know....A review of 50 years of research about families concluded that rituals, "convey 'this is who we are' as a group and provide continuity in meaning across generations." Social scientists view rituals as routines with symbolic meaning; not to be confused with religious rituals.
Teenagers Benefit from Regular Family Meals
December 3, 2007
Did You Know...Only a third of kids in grades 11 and 12 have dinner with their families on a regular basis? Yet study after study shows that teenagers benefit from regular family meals.
What's Left Over During Holiday Times
November 27, 2007
After the holiday meal, I have a hard time throwing out that turkey carcass. I find a big pot, throw in a bunch of left-over vegetables, and produce turkey soup. My friend, Patricia, uses the ham bone from her Christmas open house to make split pea soup. It's good to have something simple and warm to get the family through the hectic holiday season.
Eating and Order
November 21, 2007
Did you know that girls who eat one or two family meals a week are more than twice as likely to have disordered eating as girls who eat three to four family meals a week?
Try It, You'll Like It
November 1, 2007
Did you know it can take eight to ten times for a child to try a new food before deciding she likes it? Scientists think our suspicions of new tastes come from the time when our ancestors roamed the jungles and plains, trying out unfamiliar species.
Welcome to Our Table
October 25, 2007
At my table, the placemats barely cover the stains made by years of homework assignments, sewing projects, mailings for causes I’m sure were important at the time. Sometimes family life is shiny and smooth. But from day to day, we are more likely to notice the scratches, the bumps.